Graduation open house season is consuming every suburban weekend and its sheet cake budget.

Also in effect on this date

The full docket. Any of these would hold up in a Monday standup.

• By late June the entire country is planning the same week off.

  Vacation · in effect 06-16 to 06-30

• The summer slump is real, documented, and conveniently unfalsifiable.

  Seasonality · in effect 06-01 to 08-15

• Out-of-office density has crossed the threshold where outreach becomes performance art.

  Vacation · in effect 06-15 to 08-15

• It is too hot to exist, let alone convert.

  Weather · in effect 06-15 to 08-31

• Campaign media buyers are already testing against your exact audiences.

  Politics · in effect 01-15 to 06-30 · election years

• Nobody comparison shops at 97 degrees.

  Weather · in effect 06-15 to 08-31

• Everybody with purchase intent is currently in a body of water.

  Weather · in effect 06-15 to 08-31

• There is an inverse correlation between heat index and add-to-cart, and this week proves it.

  Weather · in effect 06-15 to 08-31